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View Full Version : Proud to be British ?


Paulwillhappy
27th June 2006, 07:57 PM
Proud to be British!

Being British is about driving in a German car to an Irish pub for a
Belgian beer, then travelling home, grabbing an Indian curry or a
Turkish
kebab on the way, to sit on Swedish furniture and watch American shows
on
a Japanese TV.

And the most British thing of all, suspicion of anything foreign.

Oh and......

Only in Britain... can a pizza get to your house faster than an
ambulance.

Only in Britain... do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to

the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people
can
buy cigarettes at the front.

Only in Britain... do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries
and
a DIET coke.

Only in Britain... do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to

the counters.

Only in Britain... do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the
drive and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.

Only in Britain... do we use answering machines to screen calls and
then
have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want
to
talk to in the first place.

Only in Britain... are there disabled parking places in front of a
skating rink.

NOT TO MENTION...

3 Brits die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.

142 Brits were injured in 1999 by not removing all pins from new
shirts.

58 Brits are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of
screwdrivers.

19 Brits have died in the last 3 years believing that Christmas
decorations were chocolate.

British Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after cracker
pulling
accidents.

101 people since 1999 have had broken parts of plastic toys pulled out
of
the soles of their feet.

18 Brits had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit
cigarette in their mouth.

A massive 543 Brits were admitted to A&E in the last two years after
opening bottles of beer with their teeth.

5 Brits were injured last year in accidents involving out of Control
Scalextric cars.

and finally.........

In 2000 eight Brits cracked their skull whilst throwing up into the
toilet.

I am proud to be British

IF YOU ARE PROUD TO BE BRITISH THEN U'LL REPOST THIS!
We might be British, but hell we are a funny lot


:eek: :D ;)

ziggyyy
27th June 2006, 08:01 PM
insert witty riposte here >> "What a T**T"

You looked in the mirror as you typed that.......

Paulwillhappy
27th June 2006, 09:47 PM
Is that Toot ?!:o

damian_steele
27th June 2006, 10:22 PM
Only in Britain...
I beg to differ.

According to Google you'll find that the line should be "Only somewhere in the English speaking world" - and I suggest that "English speaking" be used in its loosest form.

All these locations appeared before page 11 of however million were used by people adopting that same old joke.

America
Australia
Britain / England
Canada
Dublin
South Africa

http://www.google.co.uk/search?q=%22can+a+pizza+get+to+your+house+faster+t han+an%22&hl=en&lr=&start=0&sa=N

damian_steele
27th June 2006, 10:46 PM
did someone mention that the gimp was awake? No, but I can see that you are by the fact you've posted again.

altogethernow123
27th June 2006, 11:01 PM
No, but I can see that you are by the fact you've posted again.

http://www.greycell.dk/v7-grafik/thumbs-up.gifnice one mate!

Pete27
27th June 2006, 11:27 PM
The intelligence of plastics posts dont give the impression he/she/it is awake lol or even all there:D