Only in America [Archive]

poppa501

26th January 2009, 01:21 PM

Seen most of this before, but thought It worth sharing.

Spread the Stupidity

Only in America ......
do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
Only in America .......
do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.
Only in America .....
do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.
Only in America ......
do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
Only in America ....
do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.
Only in America .....
do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.

EVER
WONDER ...
Why.....
the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin ?
Why.....
women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?
Why.....
don't you ever see the headline 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?
Why.....
is 'abbreviated' such a long word?
Why.....
is it that doctors call what they do 'practice'?
Why.....
is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dish washing liquid made with real lemons?
Why. ....
is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why ....
is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Why.....
isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
Why.....
didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
Why.....
do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?!
Why.....
don't sheep shrink when it rains?
Why.....
are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

Love to all
Poppa

Cocksparrer

26th January 2009, 01:27 PM

LOL why indeed

DanTheMan3

26th January 2009, 02:13 PM

Not only in America.
Most of that is the same over here.
.

jeweleffects

26th January 2009, 05:59 PM

Good one!
:D:D:D

penny291

26th January 2009, 06:03 PM

too true:)

redmerlin777

26th January 2009, 06:11 PM

hey Poppa...... All of that applies to the UK ( Well this bit anyway) Now...:D

And

Why is there always a teaspoon at the bottom of the washing up bowl when you THINK you have finished the washing up ? :D

hopeful2

26th January 2009, 08:35 PM

Only in America..lol..:rolleyes:

klj

26th January 2009, 08:44 PM

Now I seriously want to know the answer to this one

Why.....
don't you ever see the headline 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?
:D

TiasTreasures

26th January 2009, 09:39 PM

Great one, Poppa!

Only in America .....
do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.

Please don't tell me they do that in the UK too! :eek:

kengillam

26th January 2009, 10:34 PM

hey Poppa...... All of that applies to the UK ( Well this bit anyway) Now...:D

And

Why is there always a teaspoon at the bottom of the washing up bowl when you THINK you have finished the washing up ? :D
It works on the same principle that the last teaspoon on a boat goes over the side with the washing up water! :D

poppa501

27th January 2009, 04:13 PM

hey Poppa...... All of that applies to the UK ( Well this bit anyway) Now...:D

And

Why is there always a teaspoon at the bottom of the washing up bowl when you THINK you have finished the washing up ? :D

Maybe for the same reason the washer and dryer eats socks! I am the only person in this household so can't blame it on anyone else. I guess the machines have to consume an occasional one to operate properly. I had a very nice pair of black socks and a pair of brown socks. I now have 1 brown and 1 black. Too good to throw away so I sometimes wear them hoping no one will notice. When they do I simply say that I have another pair at home just like them.

Love to all
Poppa

PATRIOT73

27th January 2009, 04:16 PM

Why is there always a teaspoon at the bottom of the washing up bowl when you THINK you have finished the washing up ?
__________________

answer.........
get a dishwasher:p

MrsBentley

27th January 2009, 04:34 PM

lol. yes God Bless the good ol' USA.
Very Very true though.

(the pharmacy is in the back for privacy reasons though=D )

redmerlin777

27th January 2009, 05:43 PM

Maybe for the same reason the washer and dryer eats socks! I am the only person in this household so can't blame it on anyone else. I guess the machines have to consume an occasional one to operate properly. I had a very nice pair of black socks and a pair of brown socks. I now have 1 brown and 1 black. Too good to throw away so I sometimes wear them hoping no one will notice. When they do I simply say that I have another pair at home just like them.

Love to all
Poppa

Poppa..I watched a program about Black holes... if they can have them in space then I think as the washing machine drum spins round it creates a Black hole...some sort of law of Physics to blame....BUT this black hole will only swallow sock shaped things, again probably due to a mathematical law.
hence the formulae

X + (BSx2)+(bsx2) = X-X (BS +bs)
Where X = Centrifugal force
BS = Black Sock
bs = brown sock

bobp9500

27th January 2009, 06:27 PM

What does "washing up" mean ??
Here in Canada we might call it "washing down" !!---boB
ps---We do have a "freezing up"

What about if you're washing your feet?---is that still washing UP ?

ChameleonSystems

27th January 2009, 08:21 PM

Maybe for the same reason the washer and dryer eats socks! I am the only person in this household so can't blame it on anyone else. I guess the machines have to consume an occasional one to operate properly. I had a very nice pair of black socks and a pair of brown socks. I now have 1 brown and 1 black. Too good to throw away so I sometimes wear them hoping no one will notice. When they do I simply say that I have another pair at home just like them.

Love to all
Poppa

This is your problem:
http://i196.photobucket.com/albums/aa98/Rocky-Waist2/rocky1/eaterofsock.jpg